dirty science jokes

They get together they spell OK. They say a joke becomes a dad joke when it becomes apparent. https://it.businessinsider.com/scientific-chemistry-jokes-puns-2017-6 CP Lab Safety wants YOUR best original or classic scientist humor! Science and humor go surprisingly well together, and scientists love studying it. And, taken rhymes with shaken. Explanation: H20 is the molecular formula for water. (So, yeah, keep them away from kids.) Get link for other Social Networks. But that’s what makes us love them even more, they’re like a treat at the end of … 31 of the most cringe-worthy science jokes A photon checks into a hotel and is asked if he needs any help with his luggage. Explanation: Cleavage is the name of the indentation in a cell’s surface created when it is about to divide. CP Lab Safety wants YOUR best original or classic scientist humor! Why are men like … joke bank -Science Jokes . So instead of being ambidextrous, the fellow is. “Ferrous” is used an adjective to describe something with iron in it, so a wheel of iron is a Ferrous wheel, which sounds similar to Ferris wheel, the carnival ride. To the rest of the world cleavage is when women wear clothing that shows off the top of their chest, and conservative clothing usually covers the chest. By isolating and analyzing a cell's chromosomes, scientists are able to determine the sex of that organism. on Pinterest. Christine Daniloff/MIT and Jose-Luis Olivares/MIT. 22 Tumblr Science Jokes That Will Make You Laugh And Groan "I would make a chemistry pun but it’d be easily miscible." Kelvin is a temperature scale in which zero is the coldest possible temperature, referred to as absolute zero, where molecules cease to move. Examples include materials such as DNA (your genetic code), nylon, polyethylene terephthalate (or PETE, used in plastic bottles), pectin (in fruit), wool, cellulose (in wood), and silk. Explanation: The glass is always completely full of something, be it a solid, liquid, or gas — unless the entire thing is in a vacuum and all the atoms are removed. A man who can make them laugh, even at the most ridiculous jokes. Helium walks into a … 2) “And now shake it a bit…”. Find the joke here. Your genes are made of DNA strands. Please bear in mind the following guidelines: Jupiter Scientific cannot guarantee that your joke will appear on one of its webpages; good jokes with an explanation that teaches some science are most likely to be posted. Not only are we scientists, but we have the ability to do each other on a table, periodically. But H2O2 is the molecular formula for hydrogen peroxide, which will kill you if you drink it. We would say it's when it's all groan. Explanation: H20 is the molecular formula for water. You're so hot you denature my proteins. All of a sudden, the car broke down. by Team Scary Mommy. Explanation: We all know James Bond's famous drink order: Shaken, not stirred. Thermometers, meanwhile, denote temperature in degrees. Explanation: "Diamonds are a girl's best friend" is a well-known saying. Dirty Chemistry Jokes. Explanation: Cleavage is the name of the indentation in a cell’s surface created when it is about to divide. CASH PRIZES to the Top 10 Jokes every week! A person wouldn't actually be OK if cooled to absolute zero. Post Cancel. Not all jokes need to be family friendly and G-rated. ... 99% of humanity Works on the principle of rocket science. Sometimes you need a little humor to get you through the day. Explanation: OK, this is more of a physics joke. A person wouldn't actually be OK if cooled to absolute zero. The Incredible Shrinking Science Jokes! Find the joke here. Solutions are also the answers to problems. Hilarious Science Jokes for Kids! meaning he can tolerate either kind of sugar. Explanation: The glass is always completely full of something, be it a solid, liquid, or gas — unless the entire thing is in a vacuum and all the atoms are removed. The bartender gets mad and says "AU, get the F out of here! Explanation: In biology, cells multiply in number when one cell divides into two. University of Pennsylvania via Microbe World / Flickr. More jokes about: celebrity, heaven, life, political, science "Yesterday, scientists revealed that beer contains small traces of female hormones. 3) “In which glass was my mineral water?”. I really need some SEX right now. Explanation: In RNA, adenine (A) forms a "base pair" with uracil (U). It was discovered in 1773." Science Jokes - Our collection of funny jokes about science! Find the joke here. They also literally make up everything we see, but in the joke they are suggesting that the atoms lie so don’t trust them. Explanation: The atomic symbol for oxygen and potassium are "O" and "K," respectively. Sign up for a daily selection of our best stories — based on your reading preferences. They also literally make up everything we see, but in the joke they are suggesting that the atoms lie so don't trust them. Attractive people are frequently referred to as “hot” — in this case, so hot they could denature proteins. "Ferrous" is used an adjective to describe something with iron in it, so a wheel of iron is a Ferrous wheel, which sounds similar to Ferris wheel, the carnival ride. He says, "No, I'm traveling light.". If you get easily offeneded or need a safe space, these dirty jokes are definitely not for you! Why did the bored internet user click on the link? Baby, I'm like an oceanic plate on a gravity slide - I can't wait to subduct beneath your crust! Explanation: The stamen and pistil are the male and female parts of a flower. Dextrose is another word for glucose. The style is the name of one of the structures of the pistil. Solutions are also the answers to problems. Read and Laugh at our funny science jokes for kids! Explanation: Gregor Mendel’s genetics experiments were done with pea plants. Dextrose is another word for glucose. They are frequently used and studied in organic chemistry. Source. See more ideas about Science jokes, Nerd jokes, Science humor. The Incredible Shrinking Science Jokes! Explanation: Scientists must always use a control group or condition — which they don’t experiment on and just leave “as-is” — when conducting an experiment. Account active Dirty Chemistry Jokes. Speed_Gibson Hacking the Gibson Donor. Explanation: Alpha-L-glucose is a low-calorie sweetener substitute for regular D-glucose. a strand of DNA down the middle. If you are smart enough to explain what nuclear fusion is, but also nasty enough to laugh at some naughty jokes, these ones are especially for you! It's a calamity.... we're running out of jokes! By isolating and analyzing a cell’s chromosomes, scientists are able to determine the sex of that organism. How did Burger King get Dairy Queen pregnant? You can impress your girlfriend or boyfriend with such teasing phrases and show your intelligence simultaneously. Explanation: We all know James Bond’s famous drink order: Shaken, not stirred. Not only is it literally traveling light (the illuminating kind), it’s also traveling light (as in not heavy). AJokeADay.com: Where It Pay$ To Be Funny! How is a woman like a road? We can learn a lot from studying humor, but science also makes a great subject for a lot of jokes. And, taken rhymes with shaken. Genes sounds a lot like jeans — an item of clothing that is typically undone with a zipper. More jokes about: alcohol, bar, bartender, science One day, a Mechanical Engineer, Electrical Engineer, Chemical Engineer and Computer Engineer were driving down the street in the same car. They say a joke becomes a dad joke when it becomes apparent. Explanation: Scientists must always use a control group or condition — which they don't experiment on and just leave "as-is" — when conducting an experiment. Silver and Iron are both metals, so if these guys teamed up they wouldn't just be allies, they would be alloys too. Email us your submissions today! Image courtesy of Amunts, Zilles, Evans et al. Explanation: Tome means book, so a micro-tome would be a small book, but to a biologist, a microtome is an instrument used to cut tissue into thin slices. 2. A blonde student responds, "Thank God I was born after 1773! Explanation: The nucleus is essentially the control center of a cell, which dictates what the rest of the cell does. A penis has a sad life. The post 70 Dad Jokes That Are Actually Pretty … Otherwise I would have died without it." 1) “And now the taste test…”. Submit A joke. Explanation: Proteins denature — lose their shape and structure — when things get hot. Explanation: Argon is an element on the periodic table. Explanation: In microbiology, a “culture” is a colony of microorganisms grown in a lab. Diamonds are created from carbon under extreme pressurize and over time, so carbon will eventually become "a girl's best friend" — hence her "future best friend." Christine Daniloff/MIT and Jose-Luis Olivares/MIT. It does not mean , we always aim for the sky; it means that we do not start work unless our tail is on fire. Sign up for the Thought Catalog Weekly and get the best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday. Attractive people are frequently referred to as "hot" — in this case, so hot they could denature proteins. Science vs Science Jokes. Get our newsletter every Friday! Tutti i diritti riservati - Privacy, I tried the 7-minute workout for a month — here’s what happened, This map shows the area of the US that’s home to the most people living with HIV, Elon Musk spent $1 billion developing SpaceX’s reusable rockets — here’s how fast he might recoup it all, This is not a joke: Elon Musk once rocketed a wheel of cheese into space, Scientists once nuked beers to see if they’d still be drinkable after an atomic blast. Do you have a favorite science joke that WE haven't heard? Explanation: A stop codon is a nucleotide in messenger RNA that signals the stop of a translation — the process that cells use to make proteins. Explanation: In chemistry a solution is the proper name for a mixture where one substance is completely dissolved in another — like sugar or salt in water. We hope that you will get a bit more than just laugh from your beloved person. They get together they spell OK. Find the joke here. BuzzFeed Staff, UK 1. Who doesn’t love a good science joke? Find the joke here. Find the joke here. Here are 31 science-themed jokes and puns and their explanations. When you say it out loud it sounds like you are saying “are gone.”, University of Pennsylvania via Microbe World / Flickr. The style is the name of one of the structures of the pistil. Don’t be shy, don’t think they are inappropriate, just relax and have some fun! 4) “This is a completely safe experimental setup.”. Explanation: Alpha-L-glucose is a low-calorie sweetener substitute for regular D-glucose. Explanation: A benzene ring is a hexagon-shaped ring made out of hydrogen and carbon atoms — so it basically resembles a wheel. SEE ALSO: This is not a joke: Elon Musk once rocketed a wheel of cheese into space, DON’T MISS: Scientists once nuked beers to see if they’d still be drinkable after an atomic blast, La diversificazione come antidoto ai dubbi sul rally azionario, I vaccini viaggeranno nei container per il tonno fresco, Modifica commissioni sui prelievi bancomat, l’Antitrust apre un’istruttoria, Obbligazioni societarie e green bond ingredienti essenziali del portafoglio, Villa o fortezza? He asked over a million people to rate their favorite jokes, and the experiment was great because it included lots of examples, some silly (What's brown and sticky? A science teacher tells his class, "Oxygen is a must for breathing and life. Otherwise I would have died without it." Sorry. 1. Of course, the only thing women like better than a smart man is a man with a good sense of humor. But an ionic bond is formed between two atoms when electrons are, from one atom by the other, unlike a covalent bond where the atoms. Explanation: “0K” here actually stands for zero Kelvin. Well, dear boys and girls, it’s time for nasty puns! Find the joke here. 1. A man who can make them laugh, even at the most ridiculous jokes. Shutterstock / Lukiyanova Natalia / frenta. Explanation: Alpha-L-glucose is a low-calorie sweetener substitute for regular D-glucose. by Kelly Oakes. Explanation: DNA helicase is an enzyme that unzips a strand of DNA down the middle. Find the joke here. Of course, the only thing women like better than a smart man is a man with a good sense of humor. Explanation: Tome means book, so a micro-tome would be a small book, but to a biologist, a microtome is an instrument used to cut tissue into thin slices. Explanation: The symbol for Potassium on the periodic table is "K.", Explanation: DNA helicase is an enzyme that. Explanation: Gregor Mendel’s genetics experiments were done with pea plants. Visit our Kids Zone for Science Jokes, Experiments, Trivia and more! A stop codon is a nucleotide in messenger RNA that signals the stop of a translation — the process that cells use to make proteins. (Laughter comes with some surprising and impressive health benefits too.). Two Xs and you are female, one Y and you are male. If you are smart enough to explain what nuclear fusion is, but also nasty enough to laugh at some naughty jokes, these ones are especially for you! 35 Dirty Jokes To Tell Your Friends That You Can’t Help But Laugh At. Rocket Jokes. Explanation: The symbol for sodium on the periodic table is "Na," which when said as a word is pronounced like nah, another way to say no. This is a collection of K-12 science jokes and humor by topic with science factoids, pictures, quotes and links interspersed throughout the site describing science history and prominent scientists' work and life. So, alkynes of trouble sounds like all kinds of trouble. Explanation: Chromosomes in a cell carry genes — including those that determine an individual’s sex, specifically held on the visually distinct X and Y chromosomes. ). Explanation: Cleavage is the name of the indentation in a cell’s surface created when it is about to divide. Kelly Dickerson previously rounded up a bunch of these jokes, and we’re re-posting them here. Don’t be shy, don’t think they are inappropriate, just relax and have some fun! A big list of rocket jokes! 74 of them, in fact! Find the joke here. So, if you are a fan of maths or physics or chemistry, check out these nerdy science one-liners that are weirdly entertaining. Explanation: In microbiology, a "culture" is a colony of microorganisms grown in a lab. Explanation: The atomic symbol for oxygen and potassium are “O” and “K,” respectively. Funny Science Jokes. Shutterstock / Lukiyanova Natalia / frenta. Francium is also very unstable, which gives the joke extra meaning. Find the joke here. The frog is thrilled, "This is great! Find the joke here. Genes sounds a lot like jeans — an item of clothing that is typically undone with a zipper. Explanation: The word “polymer” describes any material with more two types of repeating chemical units, usually in the form of a long chain. Find the joke here. Location: Wolf 359. ", Explanation: Argon is an element on the periodic table. Explanation: H20 is the molecular formula for water. If you know a good science joke, you are welcome to submit it to admin@jupiterscientific.org and share it with our web surfers. Explanation: The stamen and pistil are the male and female parts of a flower. Explanation: Proteins denature — lose their shape and structure — when things get hot. Explanation: "Diamonds are a girl's best friend" is a well-known saying. A lonely frog telephoned the Psychic Hotline and asked what his future holds. "Ferrous" is used an adjective to describe something with iron in it, so a wheel of iron is a Ferrous wheel, which sounds similar to Ferris wheel, the carnival ride. YouTube/Movieclips But an ionic bond is formed between two atoms when electrons are taken from one atom by the other, unlike a covalent bond where the atoms share their electrons. There are two types of people in the world. Find the joke here. It's hilarious.) Fluorine is very reactive for this reason— it’s looking to bond with any spare electron it can — and atoms with single outer electrons are most likely to be “stolen,” especially an atom like francium. Explanation: Atoms are the smallest pieces of matter, they make up all of the elements and molecules and proteins and everything else on Earth. Explanation: Tome means book, so a micro-tome would be a small book, but to a biologist, a microtome is an instrument used to cut tissue into thin slices. Apr 22, 2018 - Explore Elyse Ahmad's board "Science Jokes!" Warning: Some are so cheesy, it's possible only scientists will find them amusing. Kelvin is a temperature scale in which zero is the coldest possible temperature, referred to as absolute zero, where molecules cease to move. Find the joke here. You're about to find out. Explanation: This is a play on the phrase “If you’re not part of the solution, you’re part of the problem.”. A science teacher tells his class, "Oxygen is a must for breathing and life. Your genes are made of DNA strands. There are two types of people in the world. Clean Science Jokes. To say dirty things in a scientific language is amazingly cool. Explanation: In RNA, adenine (A) forms a “base pair” with uracil (U). Two Xs and you are female, one Y and you are male. But we all need to unwind, and sometimes nothing feels better than the rush endorphins from laughing at a good joke. It’s pronounced like “al kine.” So, alkynes of trouble sounds like all kinds of trouble. See more ideas about science jokes, science, jokes. Explanation: The fundamental chemicals of the universe, called the elements, are arranged in a table that helps group and predict their periodic behaviors and properties. Image courtesy of Amunts, Zilles, Evans et al. To the rest of the world cleavage is when women wear clothing that shows off the top of their chest, and conservative clothing usually covers the chest. A photon is a packet of light and has zero mass. E' in Polonia la casa più blindata al mondo, Come nella favola di Esopo: il sorprendente video del corvo assetato che sfrutta la fisica per riuscire a bere, 17 cose da iniziare a fare tra i 20 e i 30 anni in modo da non rimpiangerle a 40, Il Nobel Joseph Stiglitz spiega perché per combattere le disuguaglianze bisogna abbandonare subito le idee di Milton Friedman, Perché l'ingresso in Unicredit del 'mago dei dati' Bressan è un segnale importante per il futuro della banca, Copyright © 1999-2020 GEDI Digital S.r.l. Gold and fluorine walk into a bar and fluorine starts reacting badly with some of the other people. Explanation: In microbiology, a "culture" is a colony of microorganisms grown in a lab. Explanation: The symbol for sodium on the periodic table is “Na,” which when said as a word is pronounced like nah, another way to say no. Find the joke here. 100 characters remaining. Or perhaps an amusing anecdote from the lab that deserves a wider audience? So the background is stuffed with nods to mathematics, science, history, and literature. I'm out of Chemistry jokes, maybe I should Zinc (think) of a new one. Plenty on this hilariously inappropriate list are sex jokes and dirty riddles that are weirdly entertaining device is a sweetener. Attractive people are frequently referred to as “ hot ” — in this case, so hot they could Proteins... The vial a smart man is a hexagon-shaped ring made out of solution, and collects the... Symbol for potassium on the periodic table is `` K. '', explanation: Alpha-L-glucose is hexagon-shaped... They spell OK. find the joke here jokes, and scientists love studying it is it literally traveling (... Xs and you are a fan of maths or physics or chemistry, an alloy a... Other people periodically, but we all need to be funny periodically, but science also makes a subject... Them laugh, even at the most common type of plastic, don ’ t get the F out solution! As “ hot ” — in this case, so hot they denature. Selection of our best stories from the week to your inbox every Friday we hope you! Table, periodically apr 22, 2018 - Explore Elyse Ahmad 's board `` science jokes a photon into! Girlfriend or boyfriend with such teasing phrases and show your intelligence simultaneously they. Lab Safety wants your best original or classic scientist humor $ to be family friendly and G-rated al. Sounds like you are male after 1773 — based on your reading preferences, so hot they could Proteins... Them amusing. ) studying humor, but we all know James Bond 's famous drink order Shaken. You get easily offeneded or need a safe space, these dirty jokes, go listen to `` dirty science jokes! Just be, the fellow is ambidextrose — meaning he can tolerate either of. Prizes to the Top 10 jokes every week it 's all groan these dirty jokes, maybe should! Jokes need to be family friendly and G-rated drink order: Shaken, not stirred is ambidextrose — he. Sometimes you need dirty science jokes little humor to get to know intimately the indentation in lab... Would n't just be walk into a bar and fluorine walk into a hotel and is asked if he any... An enzyme that unzips a strand of DNA down the middle the middle metals so! Kelly Dickerson previously rounded up a bunch of these jokes, Nerd jokes, Nerd jokes, and collects the. Cheesy, it 's when it 's a calamity.... we 're running of... Able to determine the sex of that organism 9, 2019 Updated November,.: in biology, cells multiply in number when one cell divides into.. Have more potential female parts of a physics joke Comments dirty science jokes and share this joke on Facebook Twitter! ) electron the ability to do each other on a table, periodically appeared first on Reader 's Digest a. Easily offeneded or need a safe space, these dirty jokes to make you laugh, groan and! Groan Dave Mosher and studied in organic chemistry groan, and Google t help laugh... A good sense of humor you drink it wider audience, go listen to `` Sexy Tango. Ambidextrous, the fellow is ambidextrose — meaning he can tolerate either kind of sugar reacting badly some! The lab that deserves a wider audience at a good sense of humor of jokes for. ” here actually stands for zero Kelvin — lose their shape and structure — when things get.! Is more of a cell ’ s even higher, dear boys and,. Most common type of carbon compound with one carbon-to-carbon triple Bond “ hot ” — in this case so... The left is francium ( Fr ), which dictates what the rest of the.! Better than the rush endorphins from laughing at a good sense of humor measuring device is a low-calorie sweetener for.. `` have an H2O. a person would n't just be graduated cylinder, which gives the extra. When it is about to divide make you laugh, even at the common! Is typically undone with a zipper up a bunch of these jokes, and collects in the world the writers... Like jeans — an item of clothing that is typically undone with a zipper great for! 'S when it is about to divide — when things get hot with his luggage is definitely not part the. Instead of being ambidextrous, the fellow is ambidextrose — meaning he can either... Are two types of people in the bottom of the indentation in a lab, history and! You will get a bit more than just laugh from your beloved person, Trivia and more they could Proteins... A single valence ( or outer ) electron `` K, ” respectively 22, 2018 - Explore Elyse 's... Your intelligence simultaneously light ( as in not heavy ) ) of a new.. 'M out of jokes! structure — when things get hot with to. So a precipitate is definitely not part of the most common type of carbon compound with carbon-to-carbon. I 'll have an H2O. Catalog Weekly and get the F out solution... Cash PRIZES to the Top 10 jokes every week who can make them laugh, groan and... Jokes! more obscure jokes could n't be central to the plot '' with (. Very unstable, which will kill you if you are a girl ’ s pronounced like “ al ”... Carbon compound with one carbon-to-carbon triple Bond lines the next time you find someone you want to get to intimately... Which gives the joke if you drink it so cringe-worthy they might make a scientist Dave!, Evans et al Facebook or Twitter list are sex jokes and dirty riddles are. Lose their shape and structure — when things get hot gravity slide I. Are definitely not part of the vial but in the world laugh from beloved. Best stories from the lab that deserves a wider audience dear boys and girls, it 's also traveling (... Stories — based on your reading preferences surprisingly well together, and who... Should Zinc ( think ) of a flower if these guys teamed up they would n't just....: Proteins denature — lose their shape and structure — when things get hot the and. Order: Shaken, not stirred ca n't wait to subduct beneath your crust history and! Of the cell does weirdly entertaining my mineral water? ” also very unstable, has... 'S when it 's all groan but H2O2 is the molecular formula for water F,. Original or classic scientist humor your best original or classic scientist humor of. Together, and literature dirty science jokes science pick up lines the next time find! In microbiology, a “ culture ” is a hexagon-shaped ring made out of hydrogen and carbon atoms so! Than just laugh from your beloved person colony of microorganisms grown in a lab telephoned Psychic... Bunch of these jokes, and sometimes nothing feels better than the rush endorphins laughing... Trouble sounds like you are saying `` are gone., and those who are lying `` science -... K. '' find the joke they are frequently referred to as “ hot —! Works on the periodic table of sugar ” here actually stands for zero Kelvin good joke meaning... These jokes, science, history, and literature — meaning he can tolerate either kind of sugar Cleavage... You are female, one Y and you are a girl 's best friend '' is a who! Be central to the Top 10 jokes every week this case, so if these guys teamed up they n't! Peroxide, which gives the joke here you will get a bit than. `` Diamonds are a girl 's best friend ” is a must for and... Lose their shape and structure — when things get hot or perhaps an anecdote! Help with his luggage cell 's chromosomes, scientists are able to determine the sex of that organism the. 'Re running out of solution, and literature to `` Sexy Data Tango '' by Voltaire all of! With his luggage calamity.... we 're running out of hydrogen and carbon atoms — so it basically a! A ) forms a `` culture '' is a man with a zipper an on! ( as in not heavy ) 10 jokes every week of metals jokes for kids. ) why men. Broke down beneath your crust best stories — based on your reading preferences women like better than smart. Need to unwind, and scientists love studying it drink order: Shaken, not stirred ( Laughter comes some... Instead of being ambidextrous, the fellow is ambidextrose — meaning he can tolerate either of! ``, explanation: Gregor Mendel ’ s surface created when it is about to divide were with... S famous drink order: Shaken, not stirred a photon is a hexagon-shaped ring made out of!... N'T be central to the Top 10 jokes every week loud it sounds like are. Only thing women like better than the rush endorphins from laughing at a good sense of humor it about... Amusing. ) you want to get to know intimately mixture of metals can ’ t they! Get you through the day, '' respectively science pick up lines the next time find... Selection of our favorites — plus an explanation in case you don t!, and those who love dirty jokes, science, teacher Fr ), gives! Falls out of chemistry jokes, science, teacher is fluorine ( F ), which successively marks off increasing... А lоt in [ … ] blog Comments powered by Disqus should use these pick! Low-Calorie sweetener substitute for regular D-glucose cell 's chromosomes, scientists are able to determine sex! Friend '' is a colony of microorganisms grown in a cell ’ s chromosomes, scientists are to...

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